5 Simple Ways To Prioritize Self-Love

We invest so much time and effort in our relationships with others that sometimes it’s easy to neglect the most important one: the relationship we have with ourselves.

It took me years to learn the true value of self-love. When we find ourselves caught in an endless pattern, we’re naturally inclined to stay in that loop. My inner confidence felt nonexistent, especially when I kept prioritizing everyone else’s needs above my own.

It wasn’t until I learned how to shift my perspective and mindset that I realized the importance of prioritizing my happiness and health.

Self-love is learning how to accept and love yourself for who you are. This means accepting that not everything has to be perfect, whether it’s your career, relationships, or personal growth. Self-love isn’t conditional but a constant steadiness that you can hold onto even through the imperfections, flaws, and unexpected detours in life.

You don’t have to wait to practice self-love until everything is exactly where you want it to be. Self-love is a heightened awareness of how you feel and the choices you make along the way to become a better version of yourself.

While the journey to self-love might look different for everyone, the most important part is learning how to find contentment where you are while working toward who you want to be. Here are 5 simple ways to prioritize self-love daily:

1. Show Up For Yourself Each Day

When I started thinking about what self-love meant, the first question I asked myself was, “What does showing up for myself look like each day?” Is it sticking to a certain routine or going with the flow? Writing for a certain amount of time per day? Or getting in a 30-minute workout, no matter how I feel?

I quickly learned that practicing self-love means committing to and showing up for yourself, regardless of whether your day goes according to plan or not.

Grief this past year forced me to slow down and intentionally take a look at my habits, intentions, actions and thoughts. Even when my days felt hard, or it felt impossible to even peel myself out of bed, I knew the importance of continually moving forward, especially on the days I didn’t feel motivated to do so.

Our priorities shift over time, especially as the seasons in our lives change. But through change and growth, we learn how to intentionally choose what will bring us closer to who we want to be, not farther away. Self-love is focusing on what’s going to support your happiness and well-being and how you can work toward that daily.

If you want to live a healthier lifestyle, maybe that means adding or subtracting foods in your diet or moving your body for a few days a week. Or if you’re trying to prioritize self-care, try listing out what makes you feel calm or brings you happiness, such as getting lost in a good book or meeting with a friend for dinner.

When we take a look inward and can figure out what’s going to motivate us when learning how to show up for ourselves, it helps us get rid of anything that doesn’t support our growth.

There’s so much truth in the quote, “It takes 30 days to make a habit, 60 to see progress, and 90 to see results.” Showing up for yourself when prioritizing self-love might not look the same each day, but as long as you’re doing the best with what you can, it’ll always be enough.

2. Learn How To Let Go Of The Past

I used to hold onto the past for a number of reasons: guilt over the choices I made, searching for closure I never received, and constantly replaying the “what if’s” in my head. We don’t realize how much we self-destruct when we keep holding onto the past, especially because we can’t go back and change what happened; we can only move forward.

When it comes to self-love, we owe it to ourselves to not let the past consume or overwhelm us. When you’re constantly fixated on past mistakes, you aren’t giving yourself a chance for a better future.

Self-love and forgiveness go hand in hand. They allow you to know deep down that even if you’ve made mistakes you aren’t proud of, they never define who you are as a person. Instead of fixating on what you can’t change, focus on how much you’ve grown or what you’ve learned. Never allow yourself to get so hung up on the past that you can’t let it go.

While no amount of wishing or hoping can change what’s already happened, self-love is knowing that you can always make different choices in the future. Your past doesn’t reflect what’s to come, but your present does. Give yourself compassion for what you didn’t understand before but do now.

3. Stay Away From Anything That Drains Your Energy 

I’m an empath to my core. I’ve found it’s easy for me to absorb others’ emotions and energy to the point where it affects me emotionally, especially when I’m around people who leave me feeling empty.

When prioritizing self-love, surround yourself with people who uplift you, care for you, and leave you feeling better after spending time with them, not worse. It’s hard to focus on what brings you true happiness and what will improve your mental health when you’re surrounded by people who constantly seek validation or expect you to meet their needs while overlooking your own.

Something I started asking myself recently after a situation or spending time with somebody is, “How did I feel afterward?” Do the people in your life make you feel like a better version of yourself, or are you mentally recovering for days on end?

When you learn to put yourself first and set boundaries with the people and situations that drain you, you protect your energy instead of completely draining it.

You can’t control how others act or respond, but you can choose where and how you want to show up.

4. Separate How You Feel From What You Know 

One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned is that just because we think something, it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s true.

Self-love means knowing that your worth isn’t conditional or dependent on circumstances. I thought I’d feel different the moment I walked across the stage and finally received my bachelor’s degree. But I can remember not feeling much different from what I did before, besides having an official piece of paper that I didn’t have before.

We often convince ourselves we’ll be happy when we get that degree, land a promotion, move to a new city, or start a new relationship. But true contentment doesn’t come from how we feel; it comes from learning to be happy where we are while waiting for what we want. Because the truth is, even when we receive what we’re waiting for, our minds will instantly shift to the next thing we want.

Separate how you feel from what you know by finding happiness with where and who you currently are. Instead of looking elsewhere, look inside for the things you can work on for yourself in the meantime. Where we direct our thoughts influences how we feel. If we focus on the bad or what we don’t have, then it’s hard to find appreciation in everything we do have.

Be aware of anything that makes you feel like you won’t be happy or able to find self-love until you get what you want. Work on shifting your inner thoughts to find contentment where you are. When we stop focusing on what’s missing, we start to notice everything we do have in its absence.

Related posts you might like:

• 5 Helpful Reminders When You’re Running On Empty
• How To Connect With Yourself When Feeling Overwhelmed
• 7 Simple Self-Care Habits To Help You Feel Like Yourself Again

6. Give Yourself The Same Unconditional Love You Give Others 

Self-love means accepting yourself wholeheartedly and extending the same unconditional love to yourself that you give others. Give yourself the same compassion and kindness that you would give somebody else, especially during the hard times you face. 

It’s completely normal to feel disappointed or upset when things aren’t going our way. Instead of looking at it as a failure within yourself, separate those feelings and learn how to feel them without holding on. You are worthy of everything you have, and the way you speak to yourself matters, especially when it comes to self-love.